Friends with benefits…..how many of you have heard that line coming from a guy’s mouth? In my experience not many. That is correct most guys aren’t that straight forward. But, I have heard the following: “I am not ready for a commitment” “I am a workaholic so I do not have time to date” “I am attracted to you but I just don’t want the emotional connection that comes with dating”. So, basically I just want to have sex and I don’t want to see you any other time.
Well, this is just fine for some people. That is right….some women are at a point in their lives where they do not mind going over to a guy’s house only after 10:00 pm and not having any other communication other than the occasional text. This is a small percentage of women in my opinion. Women are emotional creatures. We crave and want to feel something, that’s just the way we are. (Again, this is my opinion)
The problem that I have is this: Just because I may not be ready for a relationship doesn’t mean I do not want to get to know you. That’s right…..I would like to know who the hell I am going to have sex with. I do not see anything wrong with that. Why can’t I know if you are family oriented or if you have any kids….why can’t we start off as friends and see if we can lead up to sex. I do not see anything wrong with that?
I had a guy tell me that I was being immature and that as an adult HE knew what he wanted. Well good for you buddy!!! I disagree with him though, because I think it is very responsible and mature of me to get to know someone before I spread my legs. Sorry not sorry!!! I am a mature woman who is very comfortable with her sexuality and happens to enjoy sex but I am not going to just throw myself at anyone. Now, don’t get me wrong. Just because I say “I want to get to know you” that doesn’t mean I’m going to wait until marriage before we have sex. And that doesn’t mean I am going to become emotionally attached. If you are a workaholic that happens to work out great because some women are not needy. In fact most women are very comfortable doing their own thing and letting you do yours.
There’s nothing wrong with taking a girl out for a drink or a movie. There’s nothing wrong with developing a friendship and trust between two people. Some women are at a point in their life where they are not ready for a relationship because to be honest their last boyfriend was an emotional rollercoaster…..So they would like to take things slow and develop a friendship that with the right chemistry could lead to a great understanding between two friends. And if things are really good maybe even a full relationship down the line. But don’t call them immature because they didn’t fall for your slick pick up line. Be mature and listen to what they are telling you. If that’s not something that you want to bother with then move on. So in the end it’s up to each person to decide what kind of friend he or she wants to be. “Friend with benefits” doesn’t have to be a bad thing if it’s done the right way.